The See Saw

GilesHilderTQLD-001

I’ve been in business now for not quite two years.  It’s been a wonderful journey and one quite honestly that has just appeared from the Universe.  Two years ago I was in the middle of having a child diagnosed with Autism and wondering why my world was being turned upside down, and now here I am.

I have been finding my way, with much help from so many gorgeous people, other photographers, family and friends. Help has arrived in the most unexpected ways and through some gorgeously unexpected people. I’ve been so open to learning, like a sea sponge absorbs the water as it ebbs and flows with the tide.  Your beautiful emails and messages, constantly keep me moving forward even in those times that all creatives have, times of self doubt and non creative moments.

As in all good and exciting journeys there will be times where some direction is needed or desired in my case….I found myself struggling in these last months.  Disillusioned with this industry that I have found myself in.  The influx of new photographers, like myself wanting to find a different direction.  However, with new direction must come movement and the challenge to progress which is what I have chosen to do.  I have invested much time, money and energy into my new profession with as much gusto and enthusiasm that is at all possible from one human being.  As I came to a space of decision making I decided that I would continue to follow what is intrinsically a part of my personality.  I will continue to push forward with as much passion and determination that I have always had no matter what it is that I have tried to achieve.  If I can raise two children on my own while forging a career, if I can create a new and blended family with success, if I can face having a child with a disability I can most certainly find my way forward with something that I love and fulfils me to no end.  I will continue to do that to the beat of my own drum. I will move forward in my photographic journey which comes from a heart centred approach, using good and sound business ethics.  I will continue to be generous and kind in business, having learnt a few resilient lessons along the way.

As I get off the see-saw and stand firmly on the ground, it turns out that I am able to see just that bit more clearly.  I love children, I guess that’s why I had four of them.  There is much inside a child, I’ve seen children who have been in the most heart wrenching situations still have the most gorgeous amounts of love and hope shine out of their little faces that it defies words.  I’ve seen children who are loved abundantly shine so brightly that as you watch them and even though they aren’t from your blood, they can bring tears to your eyes. This is why I feel so creative when I capture them.  They take me on a little journey and share a part of a story.  There is an intimacy that exists which is just delightful.

Intimacy: that is the word that I discovered while having some mentoring.  That is what I enjoy the most when doing portraiture. There is a relationship that is built when you capture someone, whether its while doing a dance running after little people, while I sit in the grass talking to someone innocently snapping away, or while I fluff around a gorgeous mumma whose belly gets in the way and causes shrieks of laughter.  It’s those beautifully exciting moments that I get to share with someone who is about to finish school, the excitement that they share with me is just beautiful.  Perhaps it’s because I’ve already experienced this with two of my own, that I can fully understand what those final weeks are like for a grad and their family.   I come away from all of these shoots feeling like I have received so much positive energy from other human beings, and I would hope that that is reciprocated.

So…where too for Beyond the Spectrum?  It’s an exciting time that’s for sure, and really, how does it get better than this?  What I do know is that I’d really like to focus more on Child Photography and individual Portraiture…..so really who know’s what’s in store for the future. I love that you are all along for the ride with me, it make things so much more fun when you can join together in excitement with others.